I Swear!

I’ve long been fascinated by alternative swear words and exclamations. They strike me as more creative than the old standards. You hear them on TV; “Shut the front door!” is a popular one these days. I’m always delighted to hear new versions or old ones I’ve never heard.

Besides, I am mildly offended at foul language, especially the f word. When I hear such language, even if it’s not directed at me, I suffer a little discomfort and wince inwardly. Most people, of course, swear when they are angry or frustrated, and many think nothing of regularly peppering their speech with all kinds of “dirty words.”

But some feel more virtuous and try to find alternatives that are less vulgar. There is a long tradition of avoiding sin and vulgarity by pronouncing swear words slightly differently, such as “Dang!” and “Fudge!”

I’d much rather hear an assortment of more imaginative phrases than the same old crudity. From the old-fashioned and wholesome “Gee whiz!” to the visual “H-E-double hockey sticks!” to the oddball “Great Grandma’s Gravy!” and the nautical “Shiver me timbers!” -- there’s a lot to choose from.

Daylight Saving Time Doesn’t Move the Earth

If I believe all the TV newscasters, this weekend I lost an hour of sleep, but I’m gaining an extra hour of daylight. I don’t believe it.

For one thing, I could have gone to bed at any time on Saturday night and still slept 8 hours or as long as I wanted, regardless of what time it was.

Also, the Earth is still moving around the sun and rotating on its axis at the same rates it was a day or two ago. It hasn’t suddenly changed its path, started moving faster during the night or slowed down during the day.

We do not gain an hour of sunlight in daylight saving time, we merely change our clocks so that the sun appears to come up and set later than it usually does.

It’s not enough to lose sleep over.

Redundancies

Almost every day I hear random redundancies come out of people’s mouths. I’m quite sure I use them too, so I’m not totally criticizing here. But they catch my ear.

One of them is the ubiquitous “3 a.m. in the morning.” (This one I do not use.) When I hear it, I always mutter, “What, as opposed to 3 a.m. in the evening?” A.M. indicates morning, so there is no need to add further description of the time of day. Either 3 a.m. or 3 in the morning will suffice.

I’ve been hearing a lot of “small little” lately. I keep hearing a local lawyer commercial that mentions the “small little check” you’ll get from the insurance company if you don’t use the lawyer’s services. I believe the intent here is emphasis: The check is smaller than small. But, really, small and little mean the same thing, don’t they? Why not emphasize with a word like tiny or a phrase like awfully small”? You could even use the oxymoronic enormously small.

One phrase I’ve railed against for a long time is “and also.” Technically, these words are two different parts of speech and there is no redundancy here. And is a conjunction and also is an adverb. And indicates a connection or addition. Also means besides or likewise. If you look up also on the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, the first example of the use of also includes and: “She’s a talented singer and also a fine actress.” Again, emphasis.

But why use both? Why not: “She’s a talented singer and a fine actress.” Also just seems like an unnecessary addition.

Do these phrases sound as odd and wrong to you as they do to me? What phrases make you cringe?

Sorry, There Is No Blog This Week

This week, I’ve been sick. I flat out don’t feel like writing a blog.

Being a planner (see last post), I had a full list of things to do for every day of this week, which I made out last week in a fit of obsessive zeal. This week, I've been looking at how many things on that list are absolutely necessary, and which ones just don’t matter.

I have decided to continue attending my classes and doing my homework. I am still actively job searching this week, although I cancelled my registration at a job fair. I didn’t think sneezing on recruiters and wiping my nose before handing over my resume would be a positive way to stand out.

Other than that, I have been resting as much as possible, which seems to be helping.

I just don’t care about any of my other “obligations” right now. So you’re not actually looking at a blog post. I just didn’t feel like writing one.

Living by the (Date)book

It’s a potential tragedy: I’ve lost my datebook.

I strive to keep my life simple. But even though I’m unemployed, I’ve still managed to book (and sometimes overbook) my time. I’ve got classes and homework, now that I’m a student again. I have job searching and networking activities. I have miscellaneous obligations, like doctor’s appointments, activities with friends and family, and the occasional theater ticket.

In short, I have a regulated, scheduled life. I have to keep track of it.

Add to this that I am an ardent list maker and planner. I write down everything I need to do, and set deadlines for myself by adding items to my calendar. And I write things down because there is so much to keep track of, that if I didn’t schedule it, I’d forget it.

Now, with the loss of my datebook, I don’t know what to do or when. Am I supposed to have tea at the White House on Monday? Am I supposed to pay the utilities bill by the 29^th? Was I planning to have a novel written by Wednesday?

Luckily, the doctor’s office will likely call me with a reminder before my appointment (if I have one). But what about all those other plans and tasks, whatever they are? Will this development bring a huge dose of happy spontaneity into my life? Or will I just degenerate into a ball of anxiety?

I don’t know what to expect. Losing my datebook was not scheduled in my datebook.

Common Sense

It’s true what they say – common sense isn’t that common.

Common sense describes an idea so basic and sensible that it’s shared by all. Is there really such a thing?

I was driving to my volunteer shift one day after a snow storm. The roads were clear, thanks to the city plows and a little melting. However, when I came into a residential neighborhood, I found a man throwing large chunks of ice across the road. I had to slow down to a crawl to make my way through this obstacle course of icebergs that were big enough to tear a hole in my undercarriage.

His common sense told him that he lived on the shady side of the street and if he ever wanted the ice to melt off his property, he needed to throw it somewhere else. He has seen other people do this and thought it was a reasonable idea.

I suppose his common sense also told him that the road in front of his house was heated or at least hotter than his property and therefore, the ice would melt away quickly. His common sense also must have told him that vehicles of all sizes, including compact cars but barring the Titanic, can easily crush icebergs.

My common sense told me that I’d be lucky to get through his street without damage to my car.

This idea of throwing ice across the road, while not shared by all, is common around here. But is it actually sensible? The city, who is in charge of clearing the road of snow and ice, would not think so. I, wincing and bouncing all the way through this rough off-roading experience, did not think so.

Do you have examples of not-so-common sense?

Plagiarism

This week in one of my classes, we discussed how to avoid the dangers of the internet in violating copyright on images. While we did not discuss text, the same thing goes for that, too.

In my working life, I’ve run into plenty of people, of all different ages, who believe that writing consists of finding information on the internet, copying it and pasting it into a Word document. Furthermore, they’ll accept any source of information as valid, presumably because it’s posted on the internet (but don’t get me started on that).

The copy-and-paste method of writing is called plagiarism.

It’s fine if you have to look up some information in order to write something. It’s fine if you use that information, even some of it word for word, as long as you cite your sources. If you only paraphrase someone else’s ideas, you should cite that source too.

Don’t let the internet mesmerize you into the idea that everything that’s out there belongs to everyone. You might be able to access it for free, but you can’t take credit for it.

You must significantly change a piece of writing (or an image) in order to call it your own. But while you’re at it, why don’t you just create a whole new piece that truly is all your own?

If you know of any links to informative sites on this subject, please post them in the comments section (with credit given where it’s due, of course!).